Friday, March 11, 2011

Classic Joke: A Rabbi, Priest, and Minister Walk into a Bar

A rabbi, priest, and minister walk into the bar. They sit down at one end, and the rabbi says, "Want to hear what I did this weekend?" The other say, "Sure."

The rabbi, whose name is Abraham, continues. "I talked with my congregation about the importance of circumcision. Our God is a God of the Covenant, and we are the people of that covenant. When we circumcise, we are literally 'cutting a covenant' in the flesh. This physical mark reminds us of who we are and to Whom we belong. It's about personal and communal identity. I am part of the divine Covenant. We are part of the divine covenant together. We are not, and never will be, alone."

The priest and minister nod together and say, "very nice." Then the priest says, "Do you want to hear what I did this weekend?" The others say, "Sure."

The priest, whose name is Peter, continues. "I talked with my congregation about the importance of liturgy. Liturgy isn't just 'meaningless ritual.' When we participate in liturgy, we are participating in an eternal story. In the beginning God calls us into being as a people. It is in community that God transforms us. It is in community that God nourishes and empowers us. It is out of community that God sends us to become enfleshed grace for others as we live out the story of Jesus in the world."

The rabbi and the minister nod together and say, "very nice." Then the minister says, "Do you want to hear what I did this weekend?" The others say, "Sure."

The minister, whose name is Paul, continues. "I preached about the importance of Scripture. The Bible is the Word of God, inspired by God to grant unto us real guidance in this and every age. It is a timeless book that bears witness to an eternal truth. And the most important thing that it does as the Word of God in text is to point us to the Word of God enfleshed: Jesus Christ, the Son of God, Savior of the World. It is the Bible, filled with divine prophecy and wisdom, that leads us to take Jesus into our hearts so that we do not find ourselves ultimately lost.

The priest nods and says "very nice." The rabbi shrugs and says, "Meh, whatever."

The bartender walks up the the three religious leaders. He asks the rabbi, "Abraham, need anything?" The rabbi says, "Yeah, I'd like a brandy." The bartender pours some brandy into a glass and slides it to him.

Then the bartender looks at the priest and asks, "Peter, need anything?" The priest says, "Yeah, I'd like a glass of wine." The bartender pops the cork on a bottle and pours out a glass of wine and slides it to him.

Then the bartender looks at the minister and asks, "Paul, need anything?" The minister says, "Yeah, I'd like a beer." The bartender pulls the tap and fills a mug full of beer and slides it to him.

The bartender then takes all their plastic and places it by the register, for at the end of the day they will pay whatever tab they run up.

Then the bartender goes down to the other end of the bar where another man sits. The bartender slides him a shot of Jameson's alongside a rum and coke, and they begin to talk.

15 comments:

mommaclark said...

~*Giggles*~

(CAR) said...

That is a terrible and very long joke.  Want to hear a better one?

A jew, christian, muslim, buddhist, agnostic, and an atheist walk into a bar.  After a brief discussion, inevitably a bar fight breaks out.  The bartender shoots a shotgun in the air and everyone stops and stares at him.  The bartendar says, "I brought you all into this world and I can take you out!"

irreverance said...

It's more of a parable really.  Sorry to hear you didn't like it.  Yours amuses me, though.  Thanks for the reply.  

(CAR) said...

okay, yours wasn't that bad - lol

irreverance said...

Thanks.  I'm just glad you drew the same parallel with the divine figure (bartender).  Maybe it wasn't as obscure as I thought it might be.  

bigmac said...

I don't get it

irreverance said...

Try thinking of it as more of a parable.

lenny said...

waste of time reading that joke....

irreverance said...

Sorry to hear you felt that way. I guess it isn't for everyone.

Jessica Smyth said...

LOL

Dan Sveaver said...

damn, 30 seconds of my life I'll never get back

Bryan Berghoef said...

Check out the recent event at Philly Beer Week:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/bryan-berghoef/a-rabbi-a-priest-and-a-minister-walked-into-a-bar_b_3417067.html?utm_hp_ref=tw

irreverance said...

Thanks for sharing that. Looks like a great thing that you're doing. I've done similar stuff in the past. Good times. Cheers!

irreverance said...

I imagine it's not for everyone.

coalcoyote said...

yea as in everyone